I guess I didn't manage to be faithful to what I said on my last post about relationships. More specifically, about my being in one. I've just spent the last week with stheh in both in Rio and São Paulo, and I couldn't be happier.

On an unrelated note, I got a new Macbook. Not the new Macbook, but, faithful to my life's tradition, my dad's old one. I haven't named it yet. It's black and pre-Leopard. I'm really considering "Vetinari" or "Sheldon", but I'm not sure yet. Ideas? Suggestions? Please help.

On another unrelated note, I made a new blog. As of now, I have the Live Journal, the blog in Portuguese and this new one. Obviously, I end up being a terrible updater. Oh, well. By the way, I need to change my LJ sidebar links. God, those are old.

Now it's back to work, college, life. While I love to spend a weekend resting and not worrying about these things, I hate the space in between usually represented by an airport or a bus terminal.

I hope they call my flight soon.

ETA: I handed in the paperwork at the International Studies Center and am one step closer to American University. Wish me luck!
ETA II: HOLY FUCK! I forgot to mention: I got 113/120 on the TOEFL iBT! Thank you so much for everyone's support. I was very, very much pleased with the score.

It's 8:30 PM on Sunday night and I'm laying down on my bed, watching The L Word's second season with the Cat asleep between my legs.

It was a quiet day. I had planned on spending it writing reports for college that are due at the end of July, but couldn't get myself to do it (by the way—I seriously can not believe I'll be back to Uni in two weeks). I guess I needed a day off. A day off not to think about college, work or social obligations.

I used to hate being alone here on weekends. Nowadays I'm starting to see the matter differently. I've been trying to be more happy spending quality time with myself, and being less co-dependent of people. It's a slow process, but I think I'm starting to see some results.

Cleaning up the house, heating up lunch, staying in bed with the Cat watching The L Word, and going out for diner by myself at a nearby restaurant to watch the game, all seem like simple and normal things to do on a Sunday. They were, however, big steps for me.

As much as I'm used to being home alone on weekends, I'm not used to enjoying it. And yet I did.

As much as I hate living in this city, I've started to develop a somewhat healthy relationship with it for the past two or three months.

I haven't really stopped ranting about public transportation, our lack of decent administrators, or some of the local's attitudes, but, then again, I guess I never will. On the other hand, I've been trying to get to know nice places to go, to eat, to see, to be entertained. You know, those little special niches that makes you think that you belong in a city, and that the city, somewhat, also belongs to you.

In the two years I lived in São Paulo I've managed to fall head-over-heels for the City. And I still do, every time I return.

In the sixteen years I've lived in Rio, I only managed to complain and compare it São Paulo. Well, I need to stop comparing, and cut some slack on the complaining. During my whole life I have heard people bitch about Rio and São Paulo, and was discriminated for either being from one city or the other.

Being born in São Paulo, living in Rio for fourteen years, moving to São Paulo for high school, returning to Rio for college and, all the while, going back and forth at least once a month, turned me into a weird hybrid. To be frank, I don't really know how to define myself, and I don't really think I should. I like being this way, and it's high time I acknowledge the part of me that is connected to this city I'm living in, and that has—despite all stressful situations it has put me through—been really good to me.

This "I'm-Also-From-Rio" process, along with the aforementioned "I'm-Self-Sufficient" process, is part of what I will call Operation Growing Up.

God, I'm nineteen years old. It doesn't sound like much, but, to me, it's a lifetime. About time I wake up.

As I'm slowing rebuilding my virtual life, I feel like I'm also slowly rebuilding some aspects of my real life.

In the last two days I've managed to get back in touch with many of my São Paulo friends, and it was a great experience. The truth is, I hadn't really been coming regularly to São Paulo for some time now. It was when I realised I had only been here four times in 2008 that I decided to have a conversation with my father, and ask him to come every fortnight.

I guess I didn't really have any time to do all I wanted to when I came here because I hadn't been coming over regularly, and it sort of became a vicious circle. My theory is that if I come more I'll have less things to do, and may even be able to find some quality time to study, which has been one of the biggest barriers for me to travel.

We'll just see how it all works out. So far, so good.

Post scriptum: stheh, I hope you managed to read this. *grins*
Post scriptum II: Me rendi ao Plurk. Se quiserem adicionar: nancydowns.